In 11.5 hours, I have to turn in a paper for my British Victorian Poetry class. All fine and dandy, except I just started on it an hour ago. In my defense, I've tried really really really hard to write it over the past week or so, but couldn't even nail down a topic until tonight. Let me walk you through the progression of my procrastination over the past 5 days...
Thursday: I woke up early, intent on heading to the library before my 11:00 class to work on the paper. That flew out the window when I realized that it was storming outside, and nothing beats sleeping in during a thunderstorm. So I slept in. Until 10:00. Which made it impossible for me to make it to my 11:00 class. I went to my next 2 classes, but felt so guilty about skipping my first one that, with the immense help of BlackBerry Sudoku and Al's, I goofed off the rest of the afternoon. And into the evening.
Friday: Friday afternoons are usually a great time to get schoolwork done at the office. But nooooo. Friday afternoon consisted of a gchat marathon with Libby, searching for hilarious houses to buy in Austin, and using successful Facebook stalking skills to track down this annoying guy that posts on a pre-med forum that Libby and I laugh at. I told myself I'd go work on the paper that evening, but my new bunion-friendly shoes had been delivered to my parent's house and I had to go try them out. For 4 hours.
Saturday: I had set aside this day as my "fun day" in the midst of what was supposed to be a productive weekend. It was definitely a fun day, but was not necessarily a break from paper-writing.
Sunday: Ok, ok. This day was a major fail, no excuses. I told myself to go to the library... but it just didn't happen. Sudoku and napping won that battle. And then I cleaned. That's how you know I'm desperately not wanting to write a paper... I clean.
Monday: I've now reached that hilariously awful point in Erin-style procrastination.
- It starts with excuses not related to schoolwork in general. I went to the library this morning, sat down with my venti latte, and then decided I hated the outfit I was wearing and went home to change.
- Next, food becomes a method of procrastination. Generally this involves me texting someone and asking them if they want to go grab some lunch. This makes me feel like I am doing something good because I am having social interaction. Camp Taco, I do not regret you.
- Then I reach the point where I work on assignments for other classes. While sitting at my desk at work, I thought of EVERYTHING else I needed to do in my other classes. I finished my portfolio for my Education class and even completed an extra credit assignment. Before I knew it, it was 4:25 aka Sporcle Wind-Down time.
- The next mode of procrastination comes in the "just trying to get situated phase." This consists of me cleaning my already clean living room, making 2 peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and searching through Netflix to decide which movie I'll watch while I gather my thoughts.
- Usually at this point, I feel hopeless and decide to switch my paper topic.
- Once I've actually started writing some Faulkner-esque stream of consciousness crap, I start to realize how screwed I am.
- After this realization, I'll usually pull out my syllabus and begin to tally up my hypothetical grade in the course. How much of my final grade is this paper worth anyway? 35%? Oh. Good.
- Repeat steps 1-8.
As I typed this, Mulder threw up a hair ball. Time to go take care of that.